Some days, grief has felt like a weight I couldn’t shift. Like a fog that made everything feel a little less real, a little less possible.

After losing my brother Darren, there were moments I didn’t know how to get through the day. The pain was too loud, and the world around me felt too quiet. But there were also moments — small, soft, and unexpected — that helped me feel just a little bit better.

I wanted to share them here. In case you’re hurting. In case today is hard for you too.

🌱 1. Walking Without a Destination

I started going for walks without a plan. I didn’t time them or set a goal. I just put on my shoes and left the house. The air, the movement, the quiet — it created space. Not to fix anything, but just to be.

🕯️ 2. Lighting a Candle for Darren

It became a little ritual. One small act of presence in his absence. Sometimes I’d say something out loud. Sometimes not. But it felt like connection.

📖 3. Writing Letters I’ll Never Send

There were so many words I didn’t get to say. So I wrote them. I wrote to him. About what I miss. About my day. About the guilt and the love and everything in between. It helped.

🍵 4. Tea, Blankets, and Soft Music

I started calling it “grief nesting.” I’d make a cup of tea, wrap myself in my favourite blanket, and play music that felt like balm. No pressure to feel better. Just permission to be held.

🌸 5. Talking to Strangers on the Internet

There’s something strangely comforting about connecting with others who don’t know you, but get you. Reddit, blog comments, grief forums — they reminded me I wasn’t the only one in this dark room.

I won’t tell you these things healed me. But they made space for the pain. And in that space, I found breath again.

If you’re reading this and grieving — I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope something in here can be your soft place too.

You’re not alone.